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Only the most evil men enjoy hurting women and children.

According to the Waco Police Department, Juan Lucas Gonzalez, 44,  was arrested over the weekend on felony stalking charges and is currently incarcerated in the McLennan County Jail. Gonzalez's bond was set a quarter of a million dollars out of concern of escalation.

For myself, it is a sigh of relief. The man that once terrorized me for 16 years is behind bars, and can no longer do me harm. That is, until he's free again. My hope though is that justice will be served for his victims, and that no one ever has to suffer at his hands again.

We'll start with public record, and then dive into my own personal experiences. This piece is titled as an opinion, due to the unfortunate fact that this man happens to be my biological father. While I've never publicly discussed my experiences with JLG, it is my hope that maybe this piece can help someone who has ever been in a similar situation.

Public Record given by Officer Bynum with the Waco Police Department

On November 18, 2016 at approximately 1:50 PM one officer responded to a call of a domestic disturbance at the 2200 block of North 43rd street in Waco. When the officer approached the residence he could hear an argument ensuing and the sounds of a woman being slapped or hit. There were obvious signs of forced entry at the doorway of the home. The officer announced his presence and entered the home and found JLG attempting to flee the residence with two of his children. The officer attempted to detain JLG, but he responded by saying he wanted to leave and that "no one can stop him." The officer and JLG struggled with each other with both kids still being held by JLG. Eventually one child was released, and another officer arrived to help subdue JLG. The altercation brought officers and JLG into a back bedroom, where JLG then began to reach into his pockets. Authorities believed JLG to be a threat and put him at taser point. When JLG realized he was being put at taser point he lifted the one remaining child he had in front of himself as if attempting to use the child as a human shield. When JLG turned away, officers were able to taze him. JLG dropped the child in a pile of laundry and a third officer recovered the child, who was fortunately unharmed.

JLG was charged with abandoning/endangering a child, assault on a public servant, and resisting arrest. JLG spent 1 year in prison for the incident.

Over the weekend JLG was arrested on felony stalking charges. JLG had repeatedly broken no-contact orders and was harassing a woman at her home, and place of work. The woman changed apartments, email addresses, and her phone number in an attempt to escape JLG, but he persisted. JLG even visited a local department store the woman is employed with, bought her a gift, and left it at her home so that she would know he was there.

Personal Experiences

So as I explained previously, I unfortunately was dealt a hand of cards that left me with JLG as my biological father. I say biological not because I have a step-father or anyone else that fills that position, but because he truly is no "father" of mine. I decided that long ago, and I intend to keep it that way. Now before you think, "oh well he's your family, you can't change it," I'll tell you, that while yes, we are biologically related, that is it. Point, blank, period.

JLG is a narcissist, but not in the way that the word is so casually used these days. JLG was diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder, and when I tell you that he embodies the definition of the word, I'm not exaggerating. For years I suffered abuse at his hands, and being an only child made it easy for him. My mom worked rotating shifts, so the time without her always felt like an eternity, but then again, there wasn't much she could do to help me, as she was also being abused.

Of course, all of these things are extremely personal, and things I felt ashamed to talk about for years, and sometimes even to this day. Parts of the above reported incidents were just regular Tuesdays for me. Being young and growing up in that kind of environment, it took a while to understand that those things aren't normal. I wasn't allowed to question anything JLG said, because he was always right, even when he wasn't.

When I was old enough to understand things for what they really were, I knew I had to get out. CPS was out of the question because JLG told me horror stories about the things that would happen to me. I was still naïve enough to believe him, and would often escape to my grandmother's home for safety. Even then, JLG would find a way to bring me back. JLG would threaten me and tell me that he would call the police and report me as a runaway. JLG would also tell my grandmother that he would report her for harboring me, so time and time again I was forced to return to him.

Around 16 I decided that enough was enough, and I left. I didn't care what happened. I just knew I couldn't live another day with him and the abuse. JLG has continued to try and reach out to me over these past 10 years, and I've continued to do everything I can to stay away from him and never be his victim again.

Looking at his smug face in these mugshots gives me feelings of disgust, terror, and angst, but I'm also hopeful. I know that while he's incarcerated, he's not a threat to me or others in the free world.

It's hard to escape the past when it continues to rear its ugly head at you. I'm unsure if I will ever be "over" the experiences I went through, however, I am working my way through it one day at a time.

Please, if you are a victim of family abuse, reach out for help. I know it's easier said than done, but you can help end the abuse. Call the Family Abuse Center's 24-Hour Crisis Hotline at 1(800) 283-8401 or the National DV Hotline at 1(800) 799-7233. 

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