WATCH THIS VIDEO! WATCH THIS VIDEO!
Sorry about the all caps up there in the title but, seriously, this video is AH-MAZING. it's four minutes of crazy 1991 pastel-colored goodness. So much fantastic. This is SIZZZZLAAAAHHHHH...
It really looks like this is a recruitment tool for some wack a doo cult that's really into salad bars and family feedin' cuts of beef. From the weird sea captain and the little girl he's apparently kidnapped to the guy dressed like a cartoon sailor and his date strolling through the dockyard to the black guy and his daughter who never ever leave the merry-go-round to the lady getting to second base with the sneezeguard. also there's workers, a dude in a parking lot with a giant cell phone, an oddly faced girl playing baseball by herself, burgers, seafood, big hair and AMERICA! All topped off with a voice at the very end hissing, "Sizzzzzlllaaahhh."
Also at one point I think I saw Sneezeguard girl macking on Scott Baio.
Riighhhhttt.
(postscript: In 2000, over 60 people became ill and a young girl died in an outbreak of E. coli O157:H7 that originated at a Sizzler restaurant in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. In 2006, all 28 Sizzler restaurants across Australia suspended salad bar service after rat poison was found in two of their Brisbane restaurants.)